I watched a movie about math. Well, it was about math and mathematicians. It sort of reminded me of work because they kept talking about how you may not be able to prove something works but sometimes, if you spend the valuable years of your youth at a desk with a pencil and paper, you can prove that it doesn’t not work. Doesn’t. Not work. Double negatives, blech!

This reminds me of work because often times, in programming and coding and blah blah blah (because I know that’s what most people hear when those words are read) there are double negatives all over the place. Not null. Not inactive. “Logic” they say, but it’s not logic. Unless, of course, the meaning of logic is actually the opposite of everything you’ve ever known as logical then yes, it’s logic. If you think that’s confusing, get this: programming has languages within languages. Styles within styles. Dialects within dialects. That means that every little wild-eyed computer geek can pretty much write code anyway she or he wants to as long as it makes sense to them and spits out the same crap at the end. [Sidebar Disclaimer: By crap I don't really mean crap. I heart programmers.]

For instance, that little button that says “Publish Post” might be obviously called Publish Post to you. You would be logical to think that was it’s name. Wrong-O! Remember what I said about logic. Instead of Publish Post, it could actually be called something like “xN11″ or “c55″ or “Paul.” Seriously. To make matters worse, the programmer can then choose her or his own abbreviation for these “names” in order to make it something she or he can remember as they go on to write the “Dynamic Whatever of the Century” or, you know, do their day to day job.

So yeah, this movie about math really got me thinking. About work. While I’m at home. Hate that. Originally, I sat down and read a few other people’s blogs and started having deep thoughts and wanted to write about how the world doesn’t add up and how we can or cannot prove certain things and how math theory has never been my strong point. Clearly, I did not accomplish this.

But maybe I accomplished something more. I once again proved two things to myself: 1) Work may be confusing but it is SO not boring. 2) Blogging will make it better.

Alternate, alternate title: I really don’t know crap about this but most of you either don’t know the difference anyway or I lost you at the second paragraph.

Apparently, for the last four years, I’ve been harboring a vicious beast. With an agenda.

Early this morning, I opened the front door and let my dog out, as I do every morning. There are no fenced yards in this neighborhood so people either use leashes or have voice control over their dogs. Since it’s 5:30 a.m. I usually don’t have to worry about anyone else being out. I let her out and stand on the porch and watch her while she takes care of business- which often includes carefully sniffing every square inch of grass in the yard. When all is sniffed and done, she trots back inside, inhales her food and hops up on the sofa for her first nap of the day.

This morning, I opened the door and she ran up to it and stopped. I urged her “come on! Go!” and she just looked out the door as if she were about to cross into the Twilight Zone. After a few more moments of contemplation, she looked at me and charged out the door so fast the carpet where she had been was smoldering. As she shot down the steps, ripped across the grass and darted straight into the street I finally saw what the big deal was.

A squirrel.

She’s never chased anything before. Unless something’s trying to get between her and her next meal, she could care less. As it turns out, she just hasn’t been provoked enough. After she came to a stop, she barked at the top of her lungs for a good minute at the squirrel who was now safely up a tree twenty yards away. Finally, after promises of dog treats, I was able to draw her attention away. I grabbed her collar and dragged the snarling sixteen pound attack dog back to the yard. As we walked back she kept looking behind her as if to say “I’ll get you. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon.”