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How to become my best friend in fifteen seconds

April 28, 2006

I was standing in the women’s restroom today adjusting my belt in front of the mirror. This woman I don’t know started chatting with me. I really thought nothing of it.

Until she said this:
(I have to mention this woman is Chinese and speaks with a somewhat heavy accent. It makes it easier to imagine just how adorable her comment was.)

“Why are you looking at yourself in the mirror like that? Don’t be so critical.”

“Oh, I wasn’t. I’m just adjusting my belt.”

“Noooo. I can tell you were looking at yourself in a bad way. Don’t do that. I would kill for your body. You look so great.”

“Huh?” The only reply I could come up with for this tiny little woman.

“You have a wonderful figure. You should show it off.”

“Oh, thank you.”

At least I’ve learned how to say thank you for a compliment. What I really wanted to say was “Oh my God, I love you. You’re my new favorite person on Earth. Can I buy you things? What do you want? Anything, promise!”

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