Four days ago, I had a Dexamethasone injection under my left patella. Don’t I sound official. This was a difficult decision for me. I had a hard time accepting that maybe I needed something else to help me with the pain. Something other than religiously stretching and practicing every physical therapy exercise I’ve ever learned, without fail. Something other than wishing really hard that I’d just get better, finally. Aside from the difficulty, I know there are associated risks. And I know it doesn’t always work.
What I also know? I’m tired of hurting. Tired of doing everything right and still not feeling good. So I gave it a shot (ha, I’m hilarious).
Four days later, it feels okay. The doctor says about six days is the time I’ll really be able to tell if it’s working. All I feel right now, though, is lazy. Because along with telling me to wait six days to see results, I also can’t run for another week. Rest, again.
Initially, I was immensely depressed to hear that news. Resting right now means no training. No long runs. Which means no marathon in May. Cue violins, please. Yes, it’s very sad. Giving up training half way before a race is sort of like building half of your dream house and then selling it to a really mean person that you know is going to install shag carpet and have no appreciation for the arched doorways or the hand-painted tile. You give up something you’re dedicated to for no other reason than the budget ran out and the loan fell through.
But then I had some time to think. The doctor didn’t say stop, he just said take some time off. Slow it down a little. And then the unexpected happened: I felt relief.
It’s hard to explain, really hard. But sometimes, when you get into running, even if you’re not competitive or even fast, you feel pressure. You feel pressure to train, set goals and put in the miles. Part of this is good, it’s good for you. It pushes you, to do better and do more. And it feels good.
It’s tiring, though. And I don’t always know when to say when. So now that I’ve been given orders to take it easy, for lack of a better phrase, I kinda like it. I feel like I’ve been given permission. I love the long runs, I love pushing myself further each week, I love the build up, I love taper. But that doesn’t mean I can’t take a break. So I’m looking forward to it. I’m looking forward to going out and enjoying a quick run. I’m looking forward to a good 10K followed by a bike ride. And if all goes well, it’ll be just what I need.
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