Well, that was one heck of an unplanned blogging break. And, oh my, did I miss reading your blogs. It was tough, and it was all I could do to not send you all emails saying “please send me links to all your recent posts so I can read them on my iPhone, kthxbye.” I thought that might be pushing it, but if this happens again, I make no promises.
Since that last long run, a lot has happened. Of course it’s been just a week but there have been 30 miles logged since then, not to mention about 150 minutes spinning, and stretching, and hydrating, and dehydrating, and eating and drinking, and deeply analyzing every element possible in order to understand how to continue to keep that lovin’ feeling for running all the while not driving everyone insane talking about it. It’s hard out there for a runna’, yo.
And that statement, in itself, is mostly a lie because I do this running thing voluntarily, which is a hard thing for a lot of people to understand. It’s a hard thing for me to understand at times, I can promise you that. These days, it’s almost like I’m running and training all over again, and for the first time. Over the last couple of months, I have been forced to listen to my body in an entirely new way. I’ve had to decide what’s important to me: time or accomplishment. I’ve had to get it out of my head that I have this life-long pace that is mine, forever and ever amen. Because it is not. Just as with any other bargain we’ve made in life based only on assumption, I do not own a pace. I am, simply put, on contract with a certain pace and that contract can be altered, broken, or traded at any time. I have control, but it is limited and I have finally learned to accept it.
I’m leading us down this road here as a long way of saying I am slower than ever before and up until about two weeks ago, I was fighting it. I was doing what I need to do, all the while living in a fantasy world that something could magically change over night. Well, the nights went, nothing changed, and I had to either fish or cut bait. I’m fishing.
I started using intervals in my training at about that time—purposeful walk breaks that would allow my legs to recuperate, so to speak, about every five minutes. As you can imagine, that makes for some slow mileage, and learning to train this way is brand new territory for me. It’s been trying and educational at the same time, but completely surprising to me, I’m enjoying it. I’m really, really enjoying it, in fact. Once again, running has taught me something and I’m reminded that doing what my body is capable of doing at the time, without pain, and with an open mind, is all I’m really after anyway. And, slowly, it’s going to lead me to the big one.
And yes I am a big running nerd.
{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }
I never tire of hearing you talk about running. Some days it makes me feel like crap that I’ve lost the fire and then, I read a post from you where you talk about losing the running mojo. And then there are days when I think of hanging up my laces and you remind me of why we do this. And then there are days when you describe the experience of running and I’m, “Preach it, Sista!” So, no, I don’t ever get tired of hearing you talk about running. I’m starting at the beginning again. The very beginning. But you’ve helped me not give up. Keep writing. Keep running.
Oh, the other day, I was doing my run/walk and I was so frustrated. You know what helped me finish? What helped me was my new mantra: Just do what you can do today.
Thanks Joe and Lesley!
In all the marathons I’ve run, I slow down and walk through the water stations. That short rest is usually the pick-me-up I need to keep going. Marathons are tough work! So awesome you’re training like crazy.
I actually found this post to be inspirational. I have had such a hard time exercising the last couple of months, culminating in a work out with legs of lead today. But somehow, after reading this, I know it will come back. ANd I will try again tomorrow.
I know exactly what you are talking about with regards to being “slow”…slower than you used to be, slower than what your normal pace is. I used to go out and without even thinking about it hit one pace. If I did a pushing it workout, there were other paces that were faster than “normal” pace and felt good after the harder paces in there too. And I’ve gotten slow, and I don’t know why….and it’s frustrating. But I do know I used to be slower, and I do know that I managed to run a BQ time so I can’t be THAT slow right? It’s all relative and I’m sure as you get back to it, it will come back…and spring might almost be here too! (I say this as hopefully we’ll hit the 20s today)
It’s incredible how running or mostly any activity we do with passion, can teach us so much about ourselves, isn’t it?